Beauty for Ashes: Five

Five.... 

I have never been a person to have a "lucky number" but this one, it seemed to be the one that I used as my guide. 

My shield, my gauge.

"In 5 years, we can financially breathe."

"In 5 years, you will have a real grown up career."

"In 5 years maybe I can really start pursing my design dreams."

You see back in March, it was 5 years that had passed since I saw 2 pink lines for the first time. 

Then I thought, no.... that was only one. 

After nine seperate tests I knew it was true.

I felt the lord whisper to me. "Give me five years, allow me to mold you, transform you, and make you and Casey into the people I want and need you to be."

What did I learn in that amount of time?

Humbling is a process, and this one simple phrase.

"Sin will make you go farther than you wanted to go, and make you pay more than you wanted to pay." 

(I have to be delicate with the words I choose to write on this matter because one day, my little girl will read them. I never want her to think I didn't love her. 

It IS because of my love for her that she is here today; so bear with me... I have also chosen to write her a special book through pictures and prayer and love notes and share with her how much we have loved her and how thankful we are that Jesus decided to make us her parents. I want this to be something for her only so she can work through the emotions privately with us, satan will use this enough to attack her so I feel that is probably the best way for us to share with her)

The drive to planned parenthood to confirm the pregnancy was the scariest drive of my life. 
I wavered back and forth between wanting an abortion, and not.... after prayer I knew the lord had instilled me with this little one.

And who was I? Who was I to stand in the way of the life he intended.
It was my responsibility to carry her and nurture her and bring her up!!

Two sweet friends daily walked those first few weeks with Casey and I. 

I went through every array of emotion possible.

Denial, excitement.... followed by denial. A whirlwind of how would we provide... back to thoughts of an abortion, thoughts of an adoption, then denial again. 

(People, I convinced myself I had a mild form of the flu for 9 weeks straight.) 

I eventually accepted the pregnancy and we proceeded to tell our parents.
That day I remembering not wanting to breathe.
Things were said, feelings were hurt, but the silence was the hardest.

Again... time.
Originally, before those pink lines; our plan was to get engaged in the summer and hopefully wed in the fall or coming spring.

Instead we got engaged in April and were married 5 weeks later.

We wed when I was 24 weeks pregnant.

Anna Caroline looks at our wedding photos now and asks where she is.
I don't lie to her, I tell her that she was with us in my tummy.

It pains me to say that, but I don't personally feel it is right to lie to her.

We had a very simple ceremony, where dear friends sang, the blazing sun almost suffocated us, 

and simple vows were exchanged.

That day we made a commitment, no matter what, no matter how hot of a fire, to tough it out. 

Those 7 months I was pregnant (that I knew about) I was well... a nomad of sorts.

We were in Tuscaloosa when we were engaged, moved home in June to marry and in July I returned to Tuscaloosa to take 2 final classes to graduate from Alabama.

I had several friends who offered to let me sleep on their couch. 

Abbie, Kara, Lauren, Heather, Christina, and Emily. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

I would send my morning text to see what people had going on that day, I spent my day at the library, or walking target, would wait for them to return from class or work for us to eat, shower, and study before bed and sleep. 

In the am I would grab my pillow, blanket and bag of clothes and head out for my next adventure for the day.

Just me and baby girl growing in my tummy.

Having her was not exciting for me like it was with the boys, it was relief that the nightmare of my previous months was over. 

Maybe that people would stop talking about me, and stop feeling sorry for me, the rumors and facebook friend requests, from the nosey, would stop.

I just wanted her here, and for time to heal what all had transpired.

In the moment I finally got to hold her I just remembering holding so tight, crying tears of joy, breathing a sigh of relief. 

Thinking how perfectly she was knit together in my womb.

And how long I had waited for this day. 

I remember no excitement in the room when the family came in to meet her. 

I only remember a slight lift of the tension felt.

I had named her Rebekah Caroline.

Casey named her Anna Claire.

Only minutes before trying to be discharged from the hospital did we settle on the name Anna Caroline.

Anna means gracious and merciful 

and Caroline means joy and song of happiness.

On November 12, 2008 she became the merciful song of happiness to our lives.

to be continued.

Beauty for Ashes a Series

The lord has really pressed upon my heart to begin to opening and sharing my story with others. 

I have started to type this post for the past 2 years and didn't have the courage to. 

I was afraid of what others would say, what they would thing, and scared to share just how much of a refining fire we walked through.

You see, god took what I considered to be this perfect life, in this perfect town, with a perfect degree, introduced me to a man I didn't know character wise exhisted. 

And then I prayed, a very very specific prayer, and he answered it. 

One simple prayer where I asked the lord to humble me. 

To take away my desires of this world and give me a heart like his.

I had no clue what he would be calling me to, and asking me and my sweet husband to walk through.

I didn't know the pain I would endure, and the blessings that would abound. 

But he did, he knew my heart, he knew Casey's heart and he chose us.

Beauty for Ashes, garment of praise, take this heart of stone

Make it yours!

New Year. Coming Clean

Let's start out this new year on the honest foot!

Not the my life and house is perfect, and squeekly clean foot, the honest one.

The little honest voice you often silence to keep you from saying the thing you shouldn't. 

You know... the one that says, "Your but really IS too big for that dress."

So..... 2013 was the hardest year of my entire existence. 

I dealt with alot of the "ish" and "such" in the silence and confines of my overly messy house. 

Truth really is.... my house has been soooo far from a blog post since we moved it that it's not even funny. 

Like could barely get it together enough to get the laundry done, kids fed, and work.. messy. 

It's embarassing but true. 

So.... when your messy... you see mess and start cleaning out. 

Around May I spoke with my friend Sibi, she said something so profound. In so many words she said: "You know Jenny Beth, this year is going to rock you, it already has, so do one little thing you can that YOU can allow to rock you. Sell everything you own. Get sold out for Jesus."

I took her literally.... 

If you live in Memphis, you have seen me on the resale pages, selling everything I own. 

If you shop the awesome Sugar Plum Consignments, you probably bought alot of my clothes, shoes, belts, bags, and coats I took there. Over $500.00 worth of stuff I wasn't using.

If it has no tangible purpose in my life... its gone. Down to those pesky paint samples. 

By June I plan on only having 10 boxes in my attic. 

Yes 10.

And you know what I learned through this process??

It's hard to sell your favorite Lilly shift dress that you fit into when you were a size 4 and thought life was totally going your way.

And it's hard to sell your favorite Tory Burch wedges, even if they slightly don't fit.

It's harder to sell all your designer jeans because since having three babies your body is trashed and hips and spread and ... uh, NOONE wants to see your crack at the playground.

You know what else? 

Selling all these things, to be sold out for Jesus, so Satan can't use your Kate Spade bag as a deterent to go do ministry work, because you are afraid one of them will steal your bag.

IT'S A BAG! 

Ya can't take it to heaven!!!!

So if you keep said bag, and it does get stolen.

 You have been brought to a place of true understanding, true rawness, of caring more about people and their hearts than your perfectly ensembled wardrobe and your bag. 

I think the hardest thing...

Is seeing people soooo consumed with these things when you realize, hey... a Gucci is just a bag, as much as this 20.00 seersucker diaperbag on my arm.

Your perspective changes, that stripping away of the things you thought that mattered, they help you see what truely matters. 

It's that phone call you never made.

Or that friend you thought about at a traffic light today but you didn't send her a "I was thinking about you text."

SO my beautiful personal highlight of 2013 was being sold out for Jesus. 

And for those of you who want proof... 

This is my closet. 

Sold out. Down to bare bones. 

And proud to rebuild the wardrobe only after I respect and rebuild my body.

2014.... I will be sold out for Jesus through intentional living. 

Please Join me.

What's your resolution?

Lately.... Fall 2013

Whew.... ever since baby Whit was born I have felt like a whirlwind of life has happened.

Seriously, like I am a gerbil endlessly running a wheel leading to nowhere, and there is nowhere to get off!

Next week is reveal week and I am "loosing hope" that we will have the bathroom completed by then. 

These challenges are fun but DANG does 6 weeks fly fast!

In other news it just hit me I have not done the "moved in with furniture post" of the house. 

Basically, I cant keep my house picked up with 3 under 4 long enough to take the pics. 

SERIOUSLY!

People are all like, "I don't know how you do it?"

I'm all... "ughhh don't come over. Looks like Hiroshima up in here."

Then sweet local customers stop by to pick up stuff and I feel terrible because this place is so crazy. 

New policy is clean room, close door, no reentry!

Fact.

Now onto some fun stuff....

 This sweet bunny usually falls asleep sitting up around dinner time. He takes an afternoon nap but never fails. We go to pick up toys before we sit down for dinner and he is either on the couch, in the swing, or his bouncer and he crashes. 

Ps. this is like my favorite pj outfit ever and its starting to get too small which makes me super sad :( 

He is officially not a newborn anymore.

And this crazy... Well... he is just flat CRAZY!

Bathed the baby the other morning, when to put a diaper on him and I hear splashing. 

I immediately grabbed my camera and snapped this pic. 

He got in baby's bath and proceeded to bathe himself in his clothes... 

SOO my life right now. And it makes me laugh!!

Off to start breakfast and make lunches. 

Happy Tuesday All!

Saying Goodbye

At one time or another in life we all have to say goodbye... To something. 

Obviously our most recent goodbye was to our home. 

Things I am going to miss terribly are my sweet elderly neighbors. They thought the world of My kids and lit up like firecrackers to see them. I plan on going back to visit them from time to time. 

I am going to miss the sound of my little Connors feet running throughout the house. The pitter patter of little feet on a conventional foundations is something I will always remember. 

And the thing I didn't do when we moved?? I kept meaning to clean the little handprints off the French doors leading to c and ac's room. I couldn't bring myself to do it. Those little handprints in the glass panes were our mark. It was the game we played everyday in that house.  We brought Anna Caroline into her first home there at 6 months. The we brought Connor home from the hospital to that house and for 2 short weeks baby Whit lived there. Sooo much of our family "happened" in that home. 

When we moved in I was in a dead end job I hated. And Casey was a bank teller. We were 22, had no married friends, and knew noone with kids. Life was hard, but we smiled, had a healthy baby and worked our fingers to the bone to fix that place up. 

We became adults in that house.We both   worked 2 jobs to be able to fix up that house and provide for our little girl. We prayed and prayed for another child and The Lord blessed us with our sweet Connor. Casey graduated college in that house, and was offered his first big boy job. I watched my husband grow from my college sweetheart, into a daddy, and a grown professional. 

I spent alot of time testing my talents through trial and error and discovered my  love for design in that house. 

We had rats, black widows, roof leaks, plumbing leaks, termites, sink holes, rotten windows, lots of paint, blood sweat and tears. 

I dreamed of the future of when we would leave that home and now that I am gone I miss all the growing we did there and the memories we made. 

I miss sewing in the kitchen and listening to my kids gather rocks in the back yard and throw them down into the drainage ditch we lived next to. 

A very very tiny part of me misses my dogs running off 2 and 3 times a week. And the panic I would feel chasing after them, just to know I would find them 4 doors down and bring them safely home. 

I know this was just a vessel for us. I will always have my memories but saying goodbye is always hard. I miss my dear friends who moved around the corner and our last minute dinner plans we would make. 

I am excited to see all the memories we make in the new place and learn the history of the new place. But Lyford Avenue will always be my first and for that the memories will always be sweeter.

The new house

We started out our home search wanting a completely fixed up home. 

After realizing there is a housing shortage in our area... Knowing #3 was due any day, and seeing how people were renovating and knowing it wasn't "us" we started looking at fixer uppers. 

The home we purchased; I remember driving by and immediately saying NO! 

It just wasn't what I was wanting in a home. Then my husband saw potential I wasn't seeing. The more we looked we kept comparing it to that home. We knew we needed to walk thru it.

After the initial walk thru I saw us putting up a Christmas tree in the dining room. And watching TV in the den. I knew this was our home. 

Without further adeu. The fixer upper part deaux! 

This will be our dining room. We hope to do lots of entertaining in here over the years. 

This is a view of the den. 

The laundry room and where preppie peonie will operate. 

And the kitchen. Ohhh the kitchen I see lots of potential! 

And here is the kids playroom!! 

Be back with more later!!

After baby was Born

Okay so baby was born. All was well. Family was here but we knew if this pregnancy was going to be Like Connors we were now playing the waiting game. 

With C my problems didn't start until 72 hours post delivery. 

Side story:

I never seemed to make the time previous to now to type the "diagnosis" after c was born 17 months ago but basically the dr knew I was in acute heart failure, after 6 months or the problem corrected itself and we found out I had an extreme magnesium deficiency. Easily fixed with supplements. (Magnesium and potassium are the two most important components to indicating heart problems, health etc)

So...been taking my magnesium. Felt soo much better, heart was doing good, headaches from mag deficiency gone. Leg cramps from mag deficiency gone. 

Okay so back to baby being born. He was here, my bp was back up an he was looking good. I noticed within the first 10 hours or so I was starting to swell so when my dr came in the next morning she had a nurse check my magnesium level. Sure enough my "normal" level of 4 had dropped back down to 1.7. The postpartum nurses kinda freaked when the dr called for me to be placed on a 4 hour magnesium drip. She said the slow infusion should get me back to where it needed to be. My dear friend heather came to visit. Then my parents again. We made it home Monday mid afternoon (dr kept me a little longer due to the mag going crazy) and my inlaws stay another few days. 

(Did I mention we were due to close July 3. With a 4 day old??? Glad that didn't happen. So my inlaws leave Tuesday or Wednesday, can't remember. That morning I called y dr, told the nurse my bp was higher and I felt like I had fluid on my lungs again. They brought me in, took blood to check mag and said my hr was 60. A little low but all other things were fine. Wed night (July 3) I started feeling worse and the swelling really picked up. 

Thursday was the 4th and my parents decided to grill out. I distinctly remember walking down the stairs and the fluid in my legs slushing around in my knees and feet. 

That's when I took this pic on Instagram. 

Serious case of the cankles. So I suffered through on the 4th and woke up Friday morning for our newborn session with our photographer. 

We drive out to her studio and I kept feeling worse and worse. I haven't gotten pics back yet but I can tell you I only remember taking one shot holding baby boy. 

Our photographer is also a NICU nurse and she told me to go straight to the ER. So we left her house and one of my very best friends met me at home and took me to the Er while casey coordinated childcare. 

We walked in the door and I know The Lord ordained for a family friend to be the nurse at the ER front desk. Desiree  took one look at my and I said look I had symptoms of HELLP last go around and I feel like death. 

Emily sat with baby while I went to the restroom and as I walk out two, not one Two ER nurses look concerned and rush me back to a room. Emily and I sit until my parents arrive. Maybe 30 minutes. 

I get hooked up to bp, hr, they take some blood and we wait maybe an hour. The ER dr comes in and calls for a chest x-ray. 

So as I am there bp goes up, hr has dropped from 60 on Wednesday to Friday at 1 or so an hr is at 42. 

Around 3 my hr has dropped to 38, my bp maxes at 217/116. The dr, my nurse, another nurse and a tech all rush in. I am immediately administered lasix to help aid in removing the fluid and they give me something to bring my bp down. 

My obgyn calls and so does my cardiologist. (Both wanted to be informed if I was going to the ER post delivery) they decide admitting me to the cardiac unit of the hospital is the best idea for the current moment.  

So Friday around 5 pm they admit me. Put me on another slow mag drip. 

Within 2 hours of being there the person in the room next to me flat lines. 

Can I tell you what it feels like to be a medical mystery noone understands and your on the cardiac floor of the hospital at 27. And noone knows what the future hours,minutes, or days hold? Scary stuff. 

The on call dr from my ob comes in saturday morning and tells me say am I definitely have a very latent form of postpartum preeclampsia. Usually manifests within 24 hours of delivery. 

An hour or so later the cardiologist on call for my dr office comes in and tells me he has never personally seen a case like mine. 

His exact words. "I don't know how to tell you this but, the Rythems from your echo and what I can tell you look good, you have mitral valve regurgitation, which to some degree is normal, but your in chronic heart failure. Hopefully one day the heart rate will normalize. Have a nice day. Your dr will call you."

Ummm wow buddy, wha???? Chronic heart failure???? I am not an 88 yr old granny!!!! 

I was kept overnight. Flooded with magnesium 3 more times. An 2 more doses of lasix. 

Did I mention magnesium gives you the effect your on fire? I thought flames were launching from my ears!!!! 

They stopped the lasix Mid afternoon Saturday July 6 to prevent me from going into kidney failure. (Kind if them huh?)

(But the swelling left, 14 pounds of fluid to be exact) 

So here I sit, with 3 beautiful babies. Was told by ob and cardiologist I am to Never get pregnant again. Cardiologists words were "well hunny, your heart could literally explode in delivery." 

Oookay then. And for now... Possibly forever I am in chronic heart failure. 

The rest is pretty uncertain. My diet must change and I could now be at higher risk for heart attacks. 

Just thankful it was nothing worse, I am alive and the baby is healthy. 

However, now I am determined to be in the best shape and health of my life. 

Sooo operation heart health has begun!!! 

Oh, and keeping up with these crazies! 

Baby Whits Birth Story

So much has happened in such an incredibly short period of time I must record it! Like.... Now! 

(Please notice how I am standing like a waddling penguin! Soo hilarious to me now!!!) 

Okay so back up to June 25th. My appointments for this pregnancy just worked out to be on Tuesdays.  On that Tuesday I was a day or two shy of 38 weeks. I was feeling pretty miserable and the dr seemed to be dismissing my concerns for a higher blood pressure. For over 6 weeks I was having ringing in my ears, flashes of light, dizzy spells etc. she said not to be concerned.

At this appointment I told her I would like a birth weight ultrasound. The tech confirmed the weight at around 7 lbs 8 oz. I knew baby was bigger than this!! I just did. Left there glad knowing everything was okay and how big to expect. 

Over the next 3 days I thought I might be leaking fluid. I know the nurses at my dr's office kept thinking I was a hypochondriac but I knew something was wrong and had been wrong for some time. Next few days went by and I knew Thursday night I wasn't feeling the baby move at all. Woke up Friday morning ( june 28) and my dad called saying he had a dream I was having the baby that day. Well that day I was determined we were having a baby. I woke up that morning not feeling very well. Casey informed me we were going to labor and delivery to see if my water actually was leaking. 

We got there about 10 am and by 11 they said no there is no fluid leaking. They kept me for another hour, checked it again and no! I was quite frustrated but what do you do? 

The kids and I napped that afternoon and  we met my parents for dinner at newks. I got the super spicy Italian sub and remember thinking it tasted Sooo bland (usually it has a good kick).we left there and went to Jerry's sno cones and I ordered the fireball sno cone. It's spicy cinnamon people! If that didn't put me into labor nothing would. Well. We got home and I thought you know what?? If I really am leaking fluid, it will do it if I go jump on the kids trampoline. Sure enough!!! It did. I packed my bags in the car. Casey put the kids in their beds and my sister came over to spend the night with them. It was supposed to rain, it was a full moon and I was determined they were keeping me! 

Got to L and D and they checked right when I got there(9:30). Nothing!!! No you are not leaking fluid. After the 11 pm shift change a nurse and in and she remembered me from when c was born. I told her about not feeling the baby, tests coming back negative and I knew something was up!! She said hangon for    just a minute let me call the dr. No one comes back until about 1:45 (there was an emergency c-section and the poor lady was hemorrhaging and  all nurses were needed to assist, so scary!) She checked again still negative! Then 10 minutes go by and my dr called  back requesting an ultrasound. Casey happened to remember from the appointment Tuesday my fluid has been at 11. Friday middle of the night it was at 4. Finally!!!!! Confirmation I was NOT loosing my mind and I knew what I was talking about! 

So Saturday June 29th about 3:30 am I was admitted to the hospital for delivery. They started pitocin then and we went to sleep to rest. 

At 7 the nurses changed and I met the nurse who brought baby whit into this world!! She was amazing people!!! We have all these random connections! Loved her as my nurse. I was admitted at 1. Everything was progressing well and around 11:30 I got my epidural at 6. Planning on a baby being her by 6,7 pm. Nurse stayed and talked to me. I told her with c once I had the epidural things went fast. She ran to check on her other two patients and said she would be back soon. Well one lady delivered so obviously there was a slight hold up. 

She came back and I was at 7, like around 1:30pm. We started talking and talking and at 2:45 she checks my vitals and starts checking the baby's monitor. She decides to do the internal monitor on baby's head. I am at 9 and we are planning on a baby within the next 2 or so hours. 

All the sudden she stops talking, and won't take her eyes off of the screens and the contractions. Out of no where she calls for help and I ask her what's going on. I could tell she was a little panicked. The other nurse gives me oxygen and that's when I knew something was up. I looked at the other nurse and said look i want to know what's going on NOW!!!! She checks me and I am almost 10.

Well just so happens 3 other women are delivering at that very moment. Dr walks in with a tech, she checks me and at that moment not only is the baby's he dropping from 155 to 84 but my blood pressure had plummeted to 84/40. All I know is there are surgical gloves and this tech breaking down the bed and the dr isn't even fully in her delivery garb and she is yelling PUSH NOW if you want to have this baby!!! It was quite serious and scary at the same time. Typically there are like 8 people around when you deliver. I had dr and these 2 nurses. Noone from nursery was present. As baby came out dr slipped the cord out from around his neck. My bp then started to go back up quickly after he was born. Dr entered the room at 3 and he came at 3:07pm. Quick and crazy!!!! 

My mom was video taping and we were all so worried baby was okay super nurse was like what's the sex???? Then we were like... Ohhh yeah!!!! It's A BOY!!!!! 

So wild!!!!

Be back with my life changing postpartum experience! 

Don't want to write too much for one post. It would be a total bore! Haha

Here is a delivery pic of baby whit I sent to family waiting in the waiting room and a pic from the day after. He was so purple and beat up. Poor fella.

And Baby makes 5!!!

On Saturday June 29, 2013 we welcomed William Thomas into this world.

"Whit" as we will be calling him weighed 8 lbs and 2 oz and was 20.5 " long.

He was my biggest baby and just as perfect as the other 2 babies.

I will just post pictures on this post and recap his "birth story" in a second post for my memory and to document for the baby book.

An Update!

For those of you who have called, texted, emailed, facebooked, instagramed, everything to check in on baby!

As of right now he or she is very content not budging so the plan is for now to carry on with life and let a csection be our last resort at 41 weeks.

In other news we have worn our knees out praying we are making the right decision, trusting the lords timing is right and praying for peace over the selling of our home. 

I have a peace right now that eerily, honestly passing all understanding that we have made the right decision.

I have painted bible verses on walls before repainting them, prayer walked this place and I am very happy to report there is a lovely family taking possession of our home a week from wednesday. 

Everything, every SINGLE step of the way has been the lords doing. 

They were the second people to look at the home. 

I prayer walked before they viewed it and when their agent called I just knew it was meant to be. 

soooo here comes the NO you ARE NOT crazy but OH YES WE ARE crazy part....

You know my official due date is July 9th... right?

So we will close here the 3rd, begin packing, etc on the 4th, on the 8th hope to close on an extreme fixer upper we found in our ideal school district in the suburbs.

And if baby isnt here from then we will go to the hospital either the 9th for an induction or the next week for a scheduled c section to welcome our new bundle of joy.

The lords timing is perfect. I know this.... for those of you that know I am an EXTREME type A organized planner you know the lord is ROCKING my world with this whole thing. 

I have been very hesitant to share this information with the general public because of our terribly horrible awful experience last year where the sell fell through the day before closing.

But again, I am really freaking everyone out with how calm I am and all I can say.... the lord has given me a complete and total peace that I cannot explain and he is carrying the situation.

If I can ask for one thing its your prayers.

Specifically the sell of our buyers home, the people purchasing their home have a contingency, they have a contingency, and we have a contingency.

We are #3 in the domino of people house changing.

Pray for smooth appraisals, repairs on inspections to be made in a timely fashion, and everyone's financing to hold solid so this domino doesn't crash. Pray the lord continues to bless everyone's financing involved.

Pray for my husband as he is amazing beyond belief for dealing with my raging hormones as we attempt to move and EVERY SINGLE person is watching me like I am an EGG about to hatch. 

Pray for my inlaws as they have graciously offered to come up here for an unknown amount of time to help us get settled and unpack.

And pray for my four year old. She is very excited about moving but obviously apprehensive and not sure how we are going to get all her things to a new house. This is the only place she has ever known and I want to make sure this doesn't rock her little world in a negative way.

End result, the me sharing with yall our exciting news is more a massive prayer request.

Thankfully we have sorted through alot since last summer and dont have alot of extras of things we dont just love or dont currently need. 

Hopefully that will mean a quicker move. 

Hope to be back again before the move with a few last things to share. 

Love each and every one of you who take the time to read this crazy thiing!

You all are such a blessing!

Getting Ready for Baby

Currently I am 36 weeks and 4 days!

Longest I have ever made it is 38 weeks...

Guess its time to make the bedding, wash the clothes and start packing the bags. 

I have put things aside, like 1 or 2 things a week but... its time to get it all out and prepare to bring baby home to this house.

First thing I found was a precious stork door hanger on etsy. I loved it but the shipping was more than the hanger...

That's where a friend from high school came in!

She made the most perfect gender neutral stork for us to use at the hospital and at home!

Isnt it adorable??

Can't wait to add either a blue or pink bow to it!

The other little thing I have found is a super cute company in Daphne, Alabama that makes wooden signs. 

I knew I wanted something different to hang over the baby's crib and this is one of her spring/summer designs!

My mother in law has already picked it up and will bring it when she comes in town for baby to be born!!

The bedding has been started and I kind of ran out of steam.

We decided on neutral bumpers and I will decide on other colors for the crib skirt and drapes once baby arrives!!

Time to go wash those clothes and show mom a last few things she might need to pick up for me.
She is on standby to go buy girly goodness if its a girl!

I just have this strong hunch its a boy. I am carrying sooo similar to how I carried C!

Whew...

Okay so... recap.. 

Been on the market 22 days. With FSBO we have had some great exposure and traffic. So far 6 showings I think and we are just waiting for the right offer to come in.

Whew is the only word I really have to recap my life basically since August. 

I was teaching at mothers day out monday, wednesday, and friday and our daughter was attending preschool across town tuesday, thursday and friday.

When we found out we were expecting in November I knew something had to give. 

Luckily I was able to switch from teaching the 3 year olds to snuggling with the babies at MDO. 

I would be lying if I said this was an easy spring. 

(most days I had these aweful bags and no makeup... remind me not to do that again!)

Our son was sick CONSTANTLY,(flu, 19 ear infections, staph infection, allergies to food, allergies to medicine, etc)  I am still having issues with my heart, and I started really pursuing my dreams of designing and creating children's clothing.

Most have asked how I did it, others asked if I am still designing. 

The long and short is I wake up at 6 am and go to bed about 1 am.

I won't lie to you, I am exhausted... and with my husband travelling about 36-38 weeks out of the year I was pretty burntout!

This past fall was a good time to re-evaluate the design, long story short I was not charging anywhere near enough, I was doing way more travelling than possible with 2 children and it just wasn't working for me. 

From now on my current clients are on retainer, we work one project at a time and don't move on to others until the current project is complete. Allows me to meet the immediate needs of that space and stay focused on the task at hand.

I have GOT to get to about 5 different houses and follow up on the completed projects as I left them with homework while I worked on the applique, taught and tried to manage everything while my husband traveled for work. 

So stay tuned on how we were able to transform these rooms. I had a blast working with each and every one of them and I am excited about some of the things being completed as I type!!

I am happy to report I have quit working at Mother's Day Out to be a full time stay at home mommy....

er.... stay at home designer..... er... full time night warrier....

Either way I am SUPER excited to recharge my batteries and let my creative juices for the ol' blog come back. 

Now that I have adjusted to the embroidery and applique and have a little bit of a hang of things expect there to be some more projects, tutorials, and excitement on here.

I apologize things have been so few and far between but there just havent been enough hours in the day!! 

Now we are home ALL summer!!!

Can't WAIT to put some pinterest projects to work and start checking off my ever growing to do list. 

First on the list... make it to the apple store and get a new charger for the laptop, becuase lets face it... I blog with laptop propped up in bed! That's just what has always worked for me.

Second on the list... hopefully.... prayerfully we wont be in this house much longer.. which means a new blog name and LOTS of new design projects.

(enough of the furniture rearranging right??)

And third..... to reveal to all of you just how organized we have become since we found out we were expecting #3 in the fall. 

Only a few more things to sell, get rid of and I will do a real life house tour of all the storage solutions we have put into plan in our small 1400 square feet. 

And all I can say is there will be tumble weed blowing through any house larger than this we have gotten rid of so much! 

SERIOUSLY!!!!

sooo what have yall been up to??? Do share because I am BACK and ready to breathe some new life into this space!!!!

What do you want to see?? 

What do yall need help with?

Lilly wants to know!!!

Guess What??

We got to catch a glimpse of this face a little earlier this week!

In a few short months we will be joining the ranks of many parents that have children close together. 

I am thankful they will be about 17 months apart and be able to grow up as best friends. (at least I hope)

I hope to take some cute pictures over the next few days and be back to share those with yall. 

and.....

Y'all know I am a picture addict. 

Found these pictures while perusing on pinterest!

Looks like we need to stary praticing these poses!

Source: anyamaria.com via Jenny Beth on Pinterest

Source: freshfromgod.blogspot.com via Jenny Beth on Pinterest

11 months old

 This month was all about distraction.

We became extremely independant, and decided we hated our socks!

We switched to a totally solids diet and filled in the gaps 3-4 times a day with a 5-6 oz bottle.

Still in a size 3 diaper.
He jumped from the 15% percentile for weight to the 50% and height is still at or above 95%

We added a few more words to our repotoire.

mama (been saying this)

dada (been saying this)

uuu aka Luke the beagle

bye

thank you

dat, when he points to something he wants

choo, for his thomas trains

I cant think of the others.

He also started waving to everyone and blowing kisses.

He is still exploring and testing his limits with climbing.

And I might add... this child NEVER stops!!!

All go... all the time!!

Bath time

This little fella LOVES bathtime. 

In fact my two babies will play in the bath for close to 45 minutes every night.

Sweet bliss to sit on the toilet, feet proped on the tub (reality people) and read a magazine while they splash and giggle together. 

Impending Sale: A reason for no posts.

This will have been our first home we have ever sold. 

I am writing this post for myself primarily to remember all the drama the sale of this home has endured.

The story:

First we got on the market, all seemed well. Had a few minor hiccups (ie our listing photos are AWEFUL and our agent wont use my edited ones. but that doesnt matter now.)

So we went on vacation over memorial day. We had a few showings that weekend and got great reviews. Our open house was less than stellar but nonetheless we were encouraged.

After the second weekend on the market we only had one more showing. Then on friday night at 6 pm of our third weekend on the market I got a call to show in exactly one hour. 

Umm... our house looked like a bomb went off and Casey was working out of town. Naturally!

So I threw everything into drawers, the washing machine and the dishwasher and somehow made a miracle happen. 

By 9 pm that night we had an offer and they wanted to view again the next morning. 

We were shocked!! It was all happening so fast. Then the reality of everything set in. 

On Sunday our agent came over for us to sign the paperwork. They were asking for closing costs, a home warranty, us to get the termite letter, and our washer and dryer, recarpeting the guesthouse, and to close on July 9. Exactly 3 weeks later.

{internally I was freaking out. sign in the yard and moved out in less than 8 weeks!! YES!}

Seemed like about a typical asking of things with what we had gathered from others on the market or who had recently sold. 

We countered with our asking price and they countered by monday night with ALL the previous, our fridge, a fence, and all rotten wood on the house. 

We knew they would ask for more but this seemed like alot. 

Come to find out all the window sills in our home were rotten. AWESOME!

We countered for the second time with fixing the wood and giving the fridge only because our agent kept telling us the first offer is the best. 

Seemed like alot but we were excited.

Things began to drag... like for 2 weeks heard nothing drag...

The first of the two weeks we found out the buyer/buyer's agent forgot to contact the bank to begin processing a loan and fully approving this guy. 

So on friday 2 weeks ago he finally had the bank begin to move forward with things.

On monday they had the inspection set up for 10 am. I thought surely they would be done by the time they were out of school at 2:30. 

Well it seems my incredibly loud beagles who were locked in their cages were HIGHLY disturbed by 5 strangers plundering through their home. (wonder why??) And this made the inspector quite flustered.

The inspection revealed we had one reveresed polarity outlet, found out ALL our window sills were rotten, something was wrong with a vent to the roof and the plumbing leading to the guest house had quite a substantial leak.(btw this is the amount of repairs we were bound to fixing per the contract) Not everything. 

We are now looking at close to 9,000.00 in repairs, closing costs, and appliances. (the fridge in the guesthouse already stays)

So we questioned our agent saying are you sure?? and she encouraged us to move forward. 

The appraisal came on wednesday. 

The number was right no target and we were elated to be making a profit considering everything we were paying in fees between the two agents, repairs and etc. 

We made all necessary repairs per the inspection. By that friday we heard back from our agent saying the appraisor contacted her and the buyers FHA financing was requiring us to scrape and paint the whole guesthouse and install a new fence along the side of our property.

(apparently FHA rules change ALOT and very often!)

For THIS buyer we felt we had given enough..... but the buyer could not get financing without these things being fixed. I freaked!! I told our agent NO WAY JOSE!!

She said we had to and we were legally bound. So she sent out her contractor to repair the remainder of the rotten wood and scrape and paint the guesthouse.

Now we have given the potential buyer close to 12,000 in repairs, appliances, closing costs and fees.

I said no way in you know where on us paying to repair/replace the fence so I contacted a lady I know at the city's code enforcement. She was soo sweet and sent someone out immediately. I missed the gentleman who inspected the fence but he said these fences were the responsibility of Tenn. Dept. of Transportation. 

I contacted the person at the City again and she gave me the director's cell #. This gentleman also sent someone out promptly. He informed me these were the city's fences not the states. 

UGH>>>>>>

So after a few more phone calls turns out they are the state's fences and we CAN NOT install a privacy fence until these are properly reinforced. PRAISE JESUS!!!

So with that we sit and we wait. 

Then on friday of last week the bomb dropped. 

The check the buyer paid the appraiser and the inspector with were bounced!!!

ARE YOU KIDDING??????

At some point to the middle of this process (like July 3, I think) my husband and I got very overwhelmed and we contacted hubby's dad. He is one of those drop everything be there in a minute types. He so graciously took some vacation days and was here in no time to help us move the items that would least effect daily living. Well we got on a roll knowing our closing date was July 9th. So we went ahead and packed everything except beds, couch, and table and chairs, and our closets of course. 

So this past saturday afternoon we made a miserably painful decision of withdrawing from this buyer. The mortgage company determined he was incapable of gaining the loan on his own and the loan officers told our agent they were moving toward "creative financing." This process should take an average of 2 weeks. 

We were sick of waiting, being drawn on. And in the end all of these unexpected fees, repairs, costs really blindsided us. So today our home hit the MLS listings again.

We are praying for 2 things.

1. Peace if we are to stay in this house a little longer

2. Endurance to move forward for the next month and see if there is another buyer out there. 

(btw we had a second offer while we were working this contract and we contacted them and they had already offered on another property)

So here we sit... with a freshly painted guesthouse, repairs complete, knowing what our home appraises for, no buyer, and an offer on the table for another home. 

Think the lord might be teaching us something through all of this??

I am leaning toward patient endurance.

Till the next chapter unfolds I sit here in my empty home making trips to the storage unit to fluff this place for potential showings. 

Prayers would be greatly appreciated.

Three Little Letters

The middle of last week my husband finished one of the longest years of our life together thus far.

After many many long hard hours of plugging away on the computer and studying harder than ever....

He passed his CPA exam!!

He is a CPA!!!!!

Soooo proud of him!!!

We celebrated with a week long vacation visiting his family and going to the incredible Gulf Coast.

Here is my cake with my inspiration.
Believe it or not I knew about this cake way way way before pinterest and just couldn't find the time to make it.

Here it is with his congrats banner.

And my picture I shared on instagram.

**I have been ALL about instagram lately. If you want to find me my name is LifeOnLyford.

Be back later with highlights from our trip.